It's only a failure if you let it be

Finals have ended and grades are in.  The semester is over and there is nothing left to stress over, right?

I wish.  

I am disappointed I did not receive the grades I wanted, especially with all the work I put in, but my husband has a great way of always putting things into perspective for me.

"You passed. Concentrate on what's coming next."

He's a man of few words.  So I'm taking his advice (for once) and looking at all the things I was able to accomplish this last semester.

I learned that five classes is too big a load for me to carry, and four is my limit.  Four is how many classes I signed up for next semester, and one is a de-stressing class.  Power yoga anyone? Yeah, that's going to kick my butt!

I rocked my speech class, which I never expected.  I enjoyed and understood astronomy and economics more than I thought I would.  I kept trying to understand my math class, though my professors comments sometimes made me want to quit, and I am ready to try again with someone new.  I have a support system in place to help me pass with a transferable grade this time.

I grew as a journalist.  I joined the paper as a way to challenge myself to write in a different style. And what a challenge!  I was sucked in immediately and somehow became the Editor-in-Chief.  And though some deadlines were not reached and had to be pushed back, I am proud of what we were able to produce and now have a plan of action to not be so last minute.  Even though I will admit, that last minute stress is a major high.

I became more involved in campus life, which was not in my plans when I returned to college. All of a sudden I have a better understanding of what the Student Government does (sometimes), how the college makes decisions, and how Student Life activities come about.  

Most importantly, I learned that when you're the boss, you have to stay late to get stuff done, and sometimes that is killer.  Midnight is a cake-walk when other deadlines have become overnights.

So even though I got a D in my math class, it's not a failure, it's a learning experience.  While I let that class stress me out ALL semester, I am moving on to understanding what I was unable to grasp the first time around.  

And that stress? I would make a New Year's resolution to combat it, but then I wouldn't, so let's just say that I have a plan to take care of it.  To the best of my ability anyway.

Let's Talk

There’s not much I can say that others have not already said.  What happened in Newtown, Connecticut is becoming way too common.  And I don’t have an answer to offer as to how to put a stop to such senseless death.

The only things I can do are comfort and reassure my own children.  

My daughter, the fearless leader, has a plan on what to do for her survival: hide.  She is small enough to fit many places and can keep quiet, she said.  

My son, on the other hand, did not want to go back to school.  While parents around the country were holding their children close in gratitude, I did not have to – my son was hanging on me and would not let go.  

It should not take a tragedy to bring families together.  We all have busy lives that include work, school, and extracurricular activities.  

Something as little as having dinner together with conversation brings people together.  My family makes a point to eat around the table when we are home together. 

We also have mandatory family fun scheduled known as FFT: Forced Family Time.  It is not as bad as it sounds; it is named so that there is no wiggle room for a way out.  We watch a movie, play a board game, or go for a walk.  Most importantly, we talk.

Instead of running around stressed, take the time to rest and relax.  Get things out in the open instead of holding them in.  I don’t punish my children for saying what they feel, I just encourage healthier and acceptable ways of releasing their anger.

I don’t pretend to know what was going through the shooter’s mind, but I can tell you those kids were scared.  I hope the survivors are afforded the ability to grieve and work thorough their emotions in private.  I hope reporters remember that.

Those kids have already been through enough, don’t you think?

November Thanks

So, because this is fun (and I’m up), I’m going to participate in the I’m thankful for month of November.  No way am I doing this one day at a time!  Here goes all 30 days.  I am thankful for:

1.       My family. Duh. They love me this much (you can’t see me holding out my arms).

2.       My dog, Griffin.  He NEVER judges me.

3.       Coffee.  Without my father’s introduction to this life saving beverage, I would not have made it this far in life.  The fact that he taught me to drink it black has saved me more than once.

4.       My cat, Waffles, because she was a scaredy-cat when she was adopted and now she’s not.  Makes me feel like a cat-whisperer that I single-handedly made her feel loved.  Okay, maybe everyone in my household helped out…

5.       Dr. Seuss.  He made rhyming and weirdness not only acceptable, but cool.

6.       Dooney & Bourke, for making fabulous purses.

7.       Elephants.  I like them.

8.       Books.  Goodness knows where I would be without the land of make-believe.  Institutionalized?

9.       Words.  Specifically, writing them.  When they are placed in good form, it is amazing what can be created.

10.   The sun, when it works, is awesome.

11.   Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Fudge Brownie Ice Cream.  Holy heaven in a pint!

12.   Nature.  Even though I am allergic to everything on the planet, it is still nice to walk through the forest and see trees, hear birds, and smell dirt. Quite serene and relaxing.

13.   SpongeBob Squarepants.  The show makes me LOL, and I love singing silly songs.

14.   My husband’s cooking ability.  Without his skill, my family would starve.

15.   Friends, the real kind.  The ones that I have sloppily cried on and left mucus-stained tracks on their shoulders.  The ones I have angrily yelled at and wanted to kill.  The ones that ignore my defenses and keep coming back for more me.  The imaginary ones…just kidding!  They’re real, I swear.  Love you all! 

16.   Helium filled balloons.  Because you can suck up the helium and sound funny.  Even though you’re not supposed to do it…

17.   Maple syrup.  Not that imitation crap, but the stuff that comes from trees.

18.   The BBC.  I would not have known The Doctor had it not been for them, and what kind of existence would that be?

19.   My parents, for coming to America.  I would not have been able to do a lot of the things I do had it not been for their determination to make the trek up north. 

20.   Medication, for helping my body correct deficiencies that enable me to live life.  Science is pretty damn incredible.

21.   Smartphones.  It’s pretty cool having the power of the internet at the tip of your fingertips.

22.   All my working body parts.  I like walking, talking, tasting, smelling, feeling, seeing – I’d hate to lose any of those things.

23.   Andrew Lloyd Webber’s The Phantom of the Opera.  Best.  Musical. EVER.

24.   Emotions.  As much as I may complain about crying at stupid touchy-feely commercials, I’d much rather be a person who feels than one who doesn’t give two-cents about a human being.

25.   Hugs. You could be having a poopy day and they make it better.

26.   Orthodontists, especially the one I had.  Without their infinite knowledge of the human mouth, I would have had one f**** up smile!

27.   Socks, for keeping my feet warm.

28.   Kids, because they are the best of human kind.  Ever notice how curious, smart, kind, and trusting they are? They live life in that moment and absorb as much as they can and make the best of each day.  I want to be just like them when I grow up.

29.   Beds, because I would hate to sleep on the floor.

30.   The military, for introducing me to my husband.  That is all.

So, what are you thankful for?

For the Love of Animals

My son has a heart of gold, and I am not just saying that because I am his mom. 

He makes sure no one is left out, shares his goodies without anyone asking, and has been known to continuously donate the balance of his fun money to Toys for Tots during the Christmas season.

The compassion he feels for the living does not just concentrate on the human population either, it transcends to animal life as well.

Any television show or movie we watch where an animal is hurt, or God forbid DIES, he has been known to shed a tear (the younger he was he bawled his eyes out – but don’t tell him I told you so).  Not just the furry dogs either; he cares for chickens and frogs just the same.

So while driving this morning on our way to an appointment, it came as no surprise when my son jumped out of his seat at the sight of road kill and cried out, “What’s that?! A raccoon?”

I glanced at my rearview mirror and a saw some kind of flat, furry animal on the road.  My specialty is not zoology, so I supposed it could be a raccoon, but I was not sure.

Accepting my answer, my son sat watch to make sure no other car ran over the poor creature’s body, including “drunk drivers.”  As we drove off he turned and said, “I hope it gets medical attention.”

Ah, time for a mom moment.  I could let him go on believing that the blood and guts all over the street were invisible, but since his occupation of choice is currently a veterinarian, I decided it was time for a reality check. 

“Um, buddy, I hate to break it to you, but I’m pretty sure it’s dead.”

He was quiet for a moment, then looked back wistfully and said, “Well, I hope at least someone picks it up so it can be buried.”

See what I mean?  Heart of gold that kid.

Baseball for Dummies

"Ice cream cone!" My son shouted, as the baseball I caught barely made it into my glove.  I shrieked as another ball came barreling towards me.  I dashed after another, huffing and puffing, and stretched my arm out to grab at it. 

This baseball season has been odd for me.  My 10-year-old is on another new team, and I am the one left who can practice with him.  Grandpa has too much on his plate and dad's work schedule has not been ideal.  That leaves me trying to improve my son's game, and not ruin it, with my limited knowledge of the sport.

This is how I ended up practicing with my son on a sunshiny day…wearing jeans.  I did not think this one through, as I was sweating like a hog.  However, once I had my rhythm, I was really enjoying myself.  I had forgotten how much fun baseball is.

Even though the season is almost over, and football will be next on our list, we can still throw the ball around and retain the arm for next year.  My expertise is not really needed, as the very nice lady who was watching us said, “You two did very well.  Good job mom.”

So, even though you may not know a thing about a sport, don’t let that keep you from attempting it.  I figure I may have a season or two left where I can still practice with my child, then it is sayonara mama.  And that sweaty, dirty grin I received from my son?  Definitely worth the pain I will be feeling the next day on my sore, sore arm.
 

Opening Day



McNaughton Field

Opening day this year was different than all the other years I have attended.  For one, it was sunny.  Every year my son has played baseball (and T-ball), Opening Day has always been a drizzly, cold mess.  Last year was so bad, it was cancelled.  The sun was a welcome change.

Pearl 07/14/11-02/21/12

Pearl

This beautiful little girl was our Pearl.   


She passed away unexpectedly on February 21, 2012.  She was 8 months old.


lrt555555

That was Griffin, our dog.  he misses her too, but he does not know his alphabet, so he ca cant write it, he can only tap on her picture.

We first met our sweet kitty when my daughter spent the night at a friend's house back in July 2011.  The family told me of the little homeless kitten they had been feeding.  They named "him" Hobo-Meow-Meow and "he" was the cutest thing ever!  Then again, which kitten isn't cute?

We were still struggling from losing our first cat, Diego, after he ran away from our move to a new place.  I guess after 8 years of living in the same place, the move was too stressful for Diego to take.  We also adopted a puppy, so perhaps all that was too overwhelming.  That loss of a pet is a painful thing to go through, so we were not looking to adopt a new kitten so soon.  It had only happened 4 months earlier, so the wounds were still fresh.  But how could we resist?  We decided to take Hobo home and make her a part of our family.

Pearl & dangly things

Apparently, Hobo missed the memo and hid out under a bed for a couple of weeks.  Once we figured out he was a she, we renamed her Pearl.  Little by little she came out of her shell, though she still ran if we made any sudden movements.  She was so skittish!  We enticed her with toys and socks, the dangly things she seemed to like most.  Her reluctance made her loving moments more endearing.   It took her about two months to come close enough to lay down on us, and purr when we pet her, but eventually that's all she wanted. 

Pearl & Griffin

She could not sleep without the dog either.  She would curl up next to Griffin and they would sleep all morning, just to run havoc in the night time.  Jerks.  I think they planned that one together.  No one could sleep if those two were awake!

Pearl would stay up long enough to see me make my cup of coffee groggily.  She would stick her whole head into the machine trying to figure out where that magic water came from.  I would have to shoo her so she would not get burnt with the hot coffee coming out.  She would do the same thing with anything she could not figure out.  Like the printer.  She heard the whirr of the parts turning, she would stick her head in the compartment to see what was coming out.  She was so curious! 

What is that?

The computer and television were other things that threw her for a loop.   She would stare at them trying her darnedest to figure them out.  Her sudden fearlessness in our home was amusing to see considering her flight reflex to stay alive. She was clearly comfortable in our presence. 

I think you can figure out that we miss her terribly.  When people go in for a routine procedure, we do not expect them to die.  Same situation here, we did not expect Pearl to die from spaying.  Her sweetness was only 5lbs and her heart could not take the stress of the surgery.  We do not hold our vet responsible, as they have always been good to us. 

Life is full of surprises.  You never know what is going to happen and you have to treat each day like it is your last.  You do not want to have any regrets. So right now, hug those you love and tell them so.  I can guarantee that no human (or pet) can hear those words enough.